Welcome back In Fine Fettle readers
Ugh, feels so good to be writing again. It’s been a minute (or 4 months…), all the same though. Thanks for sticking around even in my absence. If you’re new, welcome! Lucky for you, you probably haven’t missed a lot.
Last week I completed a 13 week nursing contract in The Villages, Florida. Which like every contract, came with it’s ups and downs.
Downside: The VIllages is the biggest retirement community in the US. Great surrounding areas but expect an hour drive to anything fun… and 30 min drive to the gym really HURT. Retired people do not have the same sense of adventure as a young buck like me. Upside: I got to spend time in north Florida, dove a fresh water spring, hang out in Orlando and Tampa. And meant a lot of really great co-workers.
All the contracts I have taken previous to this one have been 4 weeks long; therefore, being back in one spot for 13 weeks was a huge adjustment. Probably sounds ridiculous to most of you i’d imagine but I feel like it’s just one of those thing you have to experience to understand.
Now that I am finished with my contract and technically unemployed at the moment… what’s next?
…
I. Have. No. Idea.
Well technically for a lack of better words, I have the next 2 weeks planned out but whatever happens after that, “I have no idea.”
I had the fortune of going in with my mom and buying a house at the end of July (yes in the midst of this crazy market) for investment purposes. So I decided to take a few weeks in between contracts to work on fixing it up.
The kitchen is going to be a major remodel but other than that it has been mostly just removing the dreaded wallpaper and putting up fresh coats of paint.
I joke about exploring new careers… dog walking, real estate agent, painter you name it but nursing is still my homee and I do look forward to my next contract wherever that may be.
I applied for a job in the Virgin Islands to potentially start mid September. I have been dyinggg to make my way out to California but licensing there is almost a joke. Ohio just passed The Nurse Licensure Compact, which allows nurses to apply for a license that is accepted in any state also within the compact. (Which is a HUGE deal in the travel nursing world; however, it’s been decided to not be effective until 2023. Boo.) Covid cases are picking back up again and states are again allowing nurses to come to their state without having their states license, which expands my travel territory.
With travel nursing, you are never short of a job but when it comes to finding a job in a place you really want to go (and that you have a state license in) it can be much more restrictive. Which is why I was still up in the air about where I will be or what I will be doing after these next 2 weeks.
I would be lying if I said that every once in awhile I get a little bit stressed and a little overwhelmed with all the decisions and endless possibilities.
I swear that I would not have my life any other way. I love this season. I love having absolutely no plan, then heading to a job 4 days later. I love the adventure and the growth I’ve seen within myself these past 9 months.
Yet growth is uncomfortable for everyone, growing pains are real! Finding yourself some days looks a lot like losing yourself. As you change so does your circle of people. Knowing you’re not alone doesn’t stop some days from feeling lonely. The future is exciting but focus too much on it and it quickly becomes overwhelming.
Some of my greatest struggles have come from situations that I simply do not understand.
I really thought that by the end of this contract (for once) I would know where I was going to be next. That I would have it all figured out because I had 13 weeks to plan and prepare for it.
But just like that, God has other plans.
August 7, 2021 Jesus Calling devotional by Sarah Young read this:
"Understanding will never bring you peace. That's why I have instructed you to trust in Me, not in your understanding. Human beings have a coracious appetite for trying to figure things out in order to gain a sense of mastery over their lives. But the world presents you with an endless series of problems. As soon as you master one set, another pops up to challenge you. The relief you had anticipated is short-lived. Soon your mind is gearing up again: searching for understanding (mastery), instead of seeking Me (your Master)."
I have gotten the same worried feeling at the end of every contract. What’s next? Where will I go? Where will I be? Should I have tried harder to line something up? Should I have done something different?
Then everything always ends up working out and I find myself questioning, frustrated why for even a second I was ever worried.
Didn’t I know God always has a plan?
Hear me out, this is why there is grace.
Because yes, I did know and I do believe that wholeheartedly God always has a plan. Satan however has a way of making us doubt our God. He creeps into our weakness and tries to magnify our fears. He will do anything he can to try and keep us from feeling the peace and love our God has to offer.
I know I have been writing on the topic of trust a lot lately but it’s because that is what God keeps bringing me back to. The simple truth of letting go and letting God… not an easy concept for me to learn clearly.
Jesus Calling devotional continued…
"The wisest of all men, Solomon, could never think his way through to Peace. His vast understanding resulted in feelings of futility, rather than in fulfillment. Finally, he lost his way and succumbed to the will of his wives by worshiping idols. My (God) Peace is not an elusive goal, hidden at the center of some complicated maze. Actually, you are always enveloped in Peace, which is inherent in My Presence. As you look to Me, you gain awareness of this precious Peace."
Seems too easy doesn’t it? To always be completely surrounded by God’s peace and His presence?
Yes, it is easy to have God’s peace but it’s only after we SEEK it that we can find it.
What is really too easy is losing your way.
The wisest person on earth did it… how could we be expected not to?
I know I cant be the only person fighting to understand the things that have happened in their life. I know I cant be the only person fighting to understand what happens next. I know I cant be the only person frustrated at how easy it is to be led astray or to let worry and fear play a role in their life.
You know this already… that trust is not easy. Letting go is not easy. Battling emotions of fear and worry is not easy.
But it can be done.
“Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossibble for you.”
Matthew 17:21
For me, it might take the last week of every single nursing contract until the end of time to be reminded that I need not fear, that I just need to believe that God’s got a perfect plan for me. And that is okay.
Even though I’ve let fear and worry creep in once every contract, God has still lent me grace and has brought me back! And every time it gets a little easier to trust him. Every time it gets a little easier to let go of everything i’ve tried so hard to hold onto in my life.
“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”
Romans 8: 28
So, the truth of it all is to trust, continue to practice letting go and surrendering your life to God’s plan NOT because its easy but because it is the better way. How though?
- Read. The. Scripture. God knows this life isn’t easy and that the worlds problems are endless. He gave you His word as a source of security and encouragement. Read it.
- Talk to God. Romans 8:26, “…the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans, And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God.”
- Engage with Community. This is actually one I’ve had a really hard time overcoming this contract here in The Villages. Even though I often view myself as a strong, independent women… it’s not without a strong support system and community of believers. Remember in adversity that it is important to stay connected even when you initially might want to pull away.
- Extend Grace. Remember that even the wisest man on earth lost his way… we are sinners inside and out, its at the core of our being. But God is patient and he will wait for you to come around and I believe you can!
Understanding does not bring peace into your life. God has instructed you to trust in him because it’s the only source of true peace.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.”
Proverbs 3:5-6
I started this blog post almost 2 weeks ago and today August 19, 2021 I still have not officially signed for my next nursing contract. I have been patient though and God has given me this abundant amount of peace and I did want to mention that an AMAZING opportunity just came up yesterday (Aug 18). A contract with the perfect start date of Aug 30, the exact date that I wanted to start back on and an amazing location.
I won’t say where until they officially send the contract and it is signed but I cannot wait to share it with y’all!
Now seems like a perfect time to go ahead and add that if you don’t want to miss a beat of whats going on here at In Fine Fettle you can subscribe down below by just adding your email to get a notification every time I post.
Until next time
xoxo
Claire Idelle
InFineFettle 